Kidnapped by My Mate - part 4

Third part here: Kidnapped by My Mate

Breakfast Revelations

Morning Confrontation

Fleeing from Heartbreak

Painful Exodus

Comfort in the Cold

Journey Through the Snow

Echoes

Secrets in Red Ink

Breakfast Revelations

BELLE

THE PRESENT DAY...

Room 101-the one that Grayson had sent me to—was on the bottom floor of the pack house and was absolutely freezing. It was no wonder this room was free. The window was broken and wouldn't close all the way, allowing the cold Minnesota winter air to come in and drop the room's temperature below anything livable.

There was even some snow piling up on the floor next to the window.

And to add to that, it seemed that people had started to use the room for storage. It was filled to the brim with boxes and various old, dusty objects. I had to dig out the small creaky bed in the corner just to lie down.

After about an hour of trying to sleep in the cold, I decided that there was no way I could stay in this room and got up to find somewhere else to spend the night. The pack house was much calmer at night with everyone in their beds.

It was the first time I was really able to get a good look at the place without feeling overwhelmed by the number of people constantly surrounding me. After poking around for a while, I eventually came across a living room filled with couches and a huge TV. This would have to do for the night. I lay down on a big leather couch.

With no blanket, no pillow, and tears staining my face, I finally drifted off to sleep.

***

I awoke to the feeling of someone violently shaking my shoulder.

"Hey, wake up!" a voice said. "You can't sleep here!"

My eyes flew open; standing above me was an older woman with a vacuum in her hand.

"Oh, I'm sorry," I said as I quickly sat up.

"You need to leave so that I can clean," the woman said.

"Yes, of course. Sorry." I stood up and was out of the room within seconds, feeling my face heat in embarrassment.

I wondered what she thought of me, and if she knew that I been kicked out of my mate's room. With my shoulders slumped and hardly any energy in my body from not eating for two days, I made my way to the kitchen, desperately hoping that I would finally be able to snag some food and water.

Once there, I let out a sigh of relief when I saw Kyle and Elijah making breakfast with the rest of the pack.

Elijah was the first to see me, and his face lit up. "Luna!" he yelled.

I approached them slowly, looking warily at the other werewolves, who seemed to be ignoring me instead of glaring at me. Strange.

"Hey," I said quietly.

I looked longingly at the food they were making, hoping that they would be willing to share with me. Kyle turned from the eggs he was frying, and his jaw dropped when he saw me. He grabbed my shoulder and turned me to look at him.

"What the fuck is that?" he said, gesturing to my beat-up face.

My hand immediately flew up to my chin, and I winced when it connected with the tender bruise that Grayson had left there last night from gripping me too hard. The pain in the left side of my face was still astronomical.

I felt panic rise in my chest as I tried to come up with an explanation that didn't involve Grayson so that I wouldn't have to face his wrath again.

"Oh, I slipped on ice last night when I was exploring outside," I said quickly, hoping that they'd believe me and not ask more questions.

Elijah nodded his head in understanding, obviously believing my story, which I was grateful for, but Kyle's eyes just narrowed in on my bruises as he studied my face some more.

I shifted nervously.

"Did the alpha lose his shit when he saw you? I can only imagine how upset that must have made him," Elijah said, shaking his head.

I nodded. "Oh, yeah. He was pretty mad. He made me put ice on it all night," I lied.

It was easy to come up with a story as I remembered how he'd cared for my bruised face when my mother's mate had hit me in Paris.

Elijah laughed. "Yeah, I bet he did." He looked at my bruises again.

"If I didn't know any better, I would say a hand made those. But I know that no one would dare to hurt an alpha's mate unless they had a death wish," Kyle said.

Interestingly, it didn't seem to occur to him that the alpha himself could've done this to me. I wouldn't have thought that either before seeing Grayson's true colors.

"Huh, yeah, that's funny. Definitely not a hand," I said as I fidgeted.

"So you're telling me that you fell on your face when you slipped?" Kyle asked.

I nodded quickly. "Yeah, it was a pretty nasty fall," I said.Kyle didn't look convinced. In fact, he looked at me with a worried expression that made me think he wasn't buying my story.

"I'm surprised Alpha didn't want to stay with you all day today with that massive bruise on your face. Your face is swollen up like a balloon. "You'd think his wolf would be going insane knowing that you were hurt," Kyle said suspiciously.

I shrugged and looked down at my hands. I hated lying to them, but knew I had no other choice-unless I wanted Kyle to go and talk to Grayson.

"He said he had a lot of really important work to do today and that he would check on me later," I said feebly.

Still not seeming convinced, Kyle continued to watch me as Elijah took over at the frying pan.

"Hey, do you think it would be okay if I stole some of your eggs?" I asked Elijah. "I haven't eaten breakfast yet."

Elijah smiled widely. "Of course! We have more than enough."

"Say, Luna, can I talk to you for a second?" Kyle asked.

I nodded my head slowly, nervously. Kyle gently put a hand on my back and ushered me to the side where nobody could hear me.

"You were right," he said once we were alone.

My brows furrowed. "About what?"

Kyle crossed his arms over his chest and looked around to make sure that no one could hear our conversation. "Alpha is acting strange—really strange."

My eyes widened. "Really?" I asked in relief. "You've noticed it too?"

Kyle nodded. "He's been making some really...odd decisions."

"Like what?" I asked.

Kyle hesitated, obviously deciding whether or not he should tell me.

"He's contemplating letting some very questionable characters into our territory. I've never disagreed with any of his decisions before, but some of the commands he's been giving have been... Well, absolutely insane."

"What do you mean, questionable characters?" I asked.

"He...he.." Kyle hesitated. He sighed. "Vampires. He wants to let vampires into our territory to 'discuss our relationship with them' or some shit like that." Kyle shook his head in disgust. He studied my face, a deep scowl twisting his features. "And then you come inhere looking like that. There's no way he would be okay with you being hurt like that."

"He isn't!" I said quickly. Our conversation from last night ran through my mind. If Grayson found out that Kyle and I were talking about him behind his back, who knew what he would do?

"He was really mad when he saw me last night," I continued. Well, at least that's not a lie.

"He...he, um, held me in his arms all night and gave me pain meds and made me ice my face. He took really good care of me." I looked down at my hands, wishing it were true.

Kyle watched me with an intense expression, one I couldn't read.

I panicked. "I'm sure everything is fine with Grayson. Really. I haven't really noticed anything off since a couple days

Kyle nodded slowly, but I could tell he still wasn't buying it. "Okay," he sighed. "Let's go get some food."

He walked back to where Elijah was, and I followed behind eagerly.

At the thought of food, my stomach let out the loudest growl, turning my face bright red. Both men looked at me.

"Luna, when was the last time you ate?" Kyle asked.

My eyes widened. "Last night," I said quickly. "I ate dinner with Grayson."

Elijah and Kyle exchanged worried glances and then looked at me.

"I know that's not true, Luna," Kyle said. "We ate with the alpha last night, and you weren't there. He said you were asleep."

My eyes widened further as I realized I'd been caught in a lie. "Oh, um..well..." I didn't know what else to say.

"Luna, I'm going to ask you again, and don't you dare lie to me. When was the last time you ate?" Kyle asked.

I looked down at my hands once more, knowing I could no longer hide the truth. "The night I first got here," I whispered.

"What?" Elijah snapped.

"What the fuck do you mean, 'the night you first got here'? That was two days ago!" Kyle yelled. "You haven't eaten in two days?"

Tears were starting to form in my eyes. I looked around the kitchen and saw that people were watching us. We were starting to make a scene.

"It's just that every time I came to one of the kitchens, they would always be so full of people and everyone would snap at me when I tried to grab some food. I didn't know what to do."

Kyle growled and ran a hand through his hair.

"Stupid territorial wolves." He sighed. "You can't take it personally, Luna. Werewolves get territorial around their food and don't like sharing. It's just the way we are as hunters."

I nodded in understanding. That made sense.

"And the alpha didn't feed you? He didn't know that you were starving yourself?" Elijah asked.

I shook my head frantically. "No, he's been super busy. It's not his fault. I don't want to bother him," I said.

"What the fuck do you mean?" Kyle snapped. "This isn't making any sense. An alpha takes extreme pride in providing for his mate. There's no way he wouldn't want to feed you, no matter how busy he is. You'll always be his number one priority."

The panic in my chest grew. I was really making a mess of things.

Grayson would be so mad if he knew about any of this. "T've been telling him that I've been finding my own food," I lied. "I feel like I've been too clingy. I need to be less dependent on him while I'm here. I can't be distracting him all day with my stupid problems. Too many people are counting on him."

"That's it," Kyle snapped. He grabbed my hand and began to pull me away.

"Elijah, you stay here and make one more fod. I want there to be enough here for her to be on the verge of sickness, I'm going to put an end to this nonsense."

Kyle continued to drag me out of the kitchen and toward Grayson's office, despite my objections. My mind replayed the conversation with Grayson from the last time I had been in his office-when he'd told me to stay away. I could only imagine how upset he would be if I went back there.

"Kyle, stop!" I yelled. "Really, I'm okay! We don't need to bother Grayson!" I tried prying his hand loose from my wrist, but he was too strong for me. "Kyle, please! Please stop!"

It had occurred to me last night that if I didn't start to get back on Grayson's good side, then I was going to lose him forever. He already seemed to not want me, and I didn't know what I would do if he never came back to me.

What I did know was that I'd have to stay out of his way if I wanted to remain in his life even if that just meant getting a glance of him every once in a while. I decided that would be enough for me.

I loved Grayson. I knew I did. I would do whatever I had to do to stay in his life.

Seeing him right now after he had specifically asked me to stay out of his office would only make him upset. I couldn't afford to have him hate me any more than he already did.

"Kyle, please stop! I can't go in there!" I tried saying more forcefully, digging my heels into the ground.

It was getting hard to talk with all the sobs coming out of my mouth. Through my tears I could see people stopping and watching us. They probably thought I was insane.

Suddenly Kyle lifted me up and threw me over his shoulder. I gasped.

"I don't know what the fuck is wrong with you, but we are fixing it right now. You will not go on thinking like this," Kyle said as he continued to march toward Grayson's office.

I pounded on his back and yelled, demanding that he put me down, but he just ignored me. I knew that it was no use anyway.

Damn werewolves and their stupid strength.

When we finally made it to the door of Grayson's office, Kyle knocked twice and then threw it open without waiting for a response. He set me down on the ground in front of him and placed his hands on both my shoulders so that I couldn't run away.

Grayson was sitting behind his desk with a phone held up to his ear, obviously in the middle of a conversation. His eyes snapped up when we entered, and they immediately narrowed at me.

"I'm sorry to disrupt, Alpha, but this is an emergency," Kyle stated.

"I'm going to have to call you back," Grayson said, and quickly hung up the phone.

He was in front of me within seconds, causing me to flinch.

"What the hell is going on? Belle, baby, why are you crying?"

He cupped my face in his two large hands and began to wipe away my tears, careful of the bruising. It confused me that he was acting so kind when all I had done was bother him since I'd gotten here.

"I'm so sorry," I said to him. "I tried to tell Kyle that I didn't want to bother you, but he dragged me here."

"What are you talking about, Belle?" Grayson asked. He turned to Kyle. "What the fuck is she talking about?"

"The luna hasn't eaten in two days," Kyle said.

"She told me that she didn't want to bother you with it, and instead chose to starve herself as she couldn't seem to get food from the kitchens with the other wolves around. I thought you would like to know."

"What?" Grayson snapped. He looked down at me. "You haven't been eating?"

"I—" I tried to explain, but I wasn't sure what to say. So instead I just nodded and looked down in shame.

Without any warning, I was thrown over Grayson's shoulder and marched out of his office. My head spun from all of the sudden movement and no food in my system.

I tried not to move while he carried me, not wanting to upset him any more than I already had. Grayson brought me to the kitchen, where he placed me down on the ground in front of everyone and pulled me in so that one arm was snuggly wrapped around my waist.

"Listen up, everybody!" Grayson yelled.

Everyone immediately stopped what they were doing and turned to look at him.

"You will all stay out of Belle's way when she is in here and allow her to take whatever she wants. "If I hear about anybody keeping her from the food inside any of the kitchens, there will be extreme consequences! Am I clear?"

A chorus of "Yes, Alpha!" rang out through the room.

"I want everybody out of here! Now!" Grayson said.

Everyone immediately filed out of the room, keeping their heads down. It amazed me how much power Grayson seemed to have over his pack. They did exactly what he said the minute he said it. I hadn't been expecting him to defend me or to put on the show of possessiveness that he just had. I watched in shock as the last person left the room.

Before I could say anything, I was lifted up and placed roughly on the kitchen counter.

A moment later, my head was sent flying backward as Grayson's hand forcefully connected with my cheek. My eyesight went for a few seconds as complete pain overtook the upper half of my body and I cried out in shock.

"Can you not do anything right, you fucking bitch?" Grayson yelled. "Can't I just get one day without you messing something up and bringing more conflict into my life? You can't even feed yourself!"

I cried some more, completely unable to think through the pain. My whole body was shaking, and I was having a hard time sitting up straight.

"I'm sorry!" I managed to get out, my voice breaking from my sobs. "I'm so sorry!"

"Yeah, whatever," Grayson growled. "What did I do in my past life to get stuck with you as a mate? I didn't even realize how pathetic a human could be until I met you. And you never fucking stop crying!"

More sobs shook my chest at his words.

"You will stay away from Kyle from now on, am I clear? You will avoid him and his mate at all costs, as you seem to only cause problems when you're near them," he said.

I sobered up a bit. "What? Kyle and Elijah are my only friends here! Everyone else hates me!"

Grayson grabbed my face with both hands, and I whimpered as he made contact with my very tender skin.

"I don't give a fuck" he said. "You will do as I say or face the consequences, got it?"

I nodded quickly, looking deep into his eyes that only seemed to get blacker and blacker with every second. It was hard to remember their true color; I hadn't seen them as anything but black since the morning after we'd gotten here.

His grip on me tightened. "I want words, Belle. Tell me you understand."

"I understand," I said quickly. "I'll stay away from them."

"Good," Grayson said. "I don't need you messing everything up. Now, you're going to get yourself cleaned up and cover

those ugly bruises on your face.

"I can't believe that you even came out here with that on display." He pressed a thumb into the bruise on my cheek.

I whimpered as excruciating pain spread through my system.

"You will not leave your room until you stop crying. Then you will come back here and make sure that everyone sees you eating. And I don't want to see your face in my office ever again."

I nodded again. "Okay," I said quietly.

Grayson looked me up and down with disgust in his eyes. "Who knew having a mate could cause me so many

problems?"

Then he left me alone.

Morning Confrontation

BELLE

The next few weeks were like my own personal hell.

I spent all of my time in the tiny bedroom at the bottom of the packhouse that Grayson had told me to sleep in, only leaving to use the bathroom and quickly grab food from one of the kitchens.

I didn't see Grayson. I didn't see anyone.

I couldn't sleep. I couldn't eat.

And to make it worse, there was a terrible pain spreading throughout my body that I knew was because I was away from Grayson.

I thought many times of just leaving, coming up with plans that consisted of sneaking out in the middle of the night and getting as far away from this place as possible.

It's not like Grayson would notice if I were gone.

He said that he wanted me here, becoming furious when I threatened to leave but never actually talks to me or checks up on me to make sure that I'm actually here.

It would be beyond easy to sneak out of here, grab a cab with what little money I had left, and go make a new life somewhere else.

But every time I summoned enough courage to finally do it, something would stop me. A tug in my chest would tell me not to give up hope, not to leave Grayson just yet.

One morning, as I tossed and turned after a restless night of no sleep, I heard footsteps outside of my door. I sat up in confusion.

Nobody ever came down here except me.

Especially not this early.

The sun hadn't even risen yet.

The person hesitated outside the door before the doorknob slowly turned.

As the stranger stepped in, I noticed my body instantly releasing all of its tension.

The dull ache that had been in my body seemed to lift from me.

I couldn't see who it was but by my body's reaction to the large figure standing in the doorway, I knew who it was.

"Grayson?" I asked into the dark.

He approached me without saying a word, acting as if I hadn't spoken.

He bent down when he had reached the bed I was sitting on and brought me into his arms, lifting me as if I weighed nothing at all.

He began carrying me out of the room and up the stairs nearby, still not speaking.

"Grayson asked again. I hesitated, not sure how to act in this situation. On the one hand, I don't want to upset him. But on the other hand, I was a little scared of where this was leading. "What's going on? Where are we going?"

"Shh," he replied. "Don't talk."

My brows knit together. What the hell was going on?

He brought me to his room, where I hadn't been in days, and kicked it open. Once inside, he unceremoniously dropped me on the bed and walked back over to the door to close and lock it.

I stared at him. "Are you going to tell me what's going on now?" I asked in a quiet voice.

He switched the lights on and approached me. His eyes were pitch black and his hair was messy. I could tell that he had just woken up. He must have gotten dressed and then gotten me right after.

Once he was standing in front of me, he crossed his arms over his chest and looked me over slowly. It felt like his eyes were criticizing every inch of my body.

"Have you gained weight?" He asked.

My jaw dropped. "Excuse me?" Did he really just bring here me just to tell me that I looked fat? If anything, I had lost weight during my time in his pack.

He scowled as he continued to analyze my body. "You look bigger," he said.

I rose to my feet. "You know what, Alpha?" I spat. "If your only reason for waking me up and bringing me to your room this early in the morning was to criticize my appearance, there's no way I'm going to sit here and take it. Fuck you." I walked past him, trying to keep my composure as I walked to the door.

But before I could leave, a gentle hand wrapped around my arm and pulled me back. I looked back at him. He ran a hand through his hair in frustration. "That's not why I brought you here. The wolf was getting antsy and wanted to be with you."

My weary mood lifted a bit. Even though his wolf was still a part of Grayson, I had a soft spot for the wolf that lived inside him. He seemed to want me even when Grayson didn't. "The wolf? Do you mean your wolf?" I asked.

He scowled at me. "Yes, my wolf. What other wolf would I be talking about?"

I dropped my gaze, suddenly feeling embarrassed. For what, I wasn't sure. "I don't know."

We stayed like that for a few seconds in silence.

I shifted uncomfortably. "Was it only your wolf who wanted to see me?"

I couldn't bring myself to look at him as I waited for his response.

I didn't truly understand why I cared so much if he wanted to see me or not but it felt like my entire life was riding on his response.

At first, he didn't say anything, but a soft hissing sound came from his chest. I looked at him then. I'd never heard him make that noise before.

"I think it's time we mate, Belle," he stated. "I need the power that you are capable of bringing me through the mate bond if we are to face what's to come."

I wasn't exactly sure what I looked like, but I was sure my eyes were about to pop out of my eye sockets from shock.

"What?" I asked.

He hissed again. "I don't like repeating myself."

In a flash, faster than I had ever seen Grayson move, he lifted me into his arms and harshly dropped me on the bed.

His lips smashed onto mine.

I gasped into the kiss, too shocked to enjoy the fact that the man I loved was touching me for the first time in weeks.

Dull sparks danced across my skin. I frowned as his lips moved down my neck. The sparks weren't nearly as strong as they usually are. In fact, this all felt wrong.

I pushed on his shoulders lightly. "Grayson, stop."

He ignored me.

I pushed on him again, harder this time. "No, I am not doing this again! You do not get to choose when you want to use me! I am not a toy, Grayson!"

I finally grabbed his face and shoved it back with all of my force.

He moved back slightly in shock, lifting his body off mine just enough for me to scramble off the bed. He hissed loudly and made an attempt to grab me and force me back on the bed but I dodged him quickly.

"What the hell is the matter with you?" I screamed. I had finally moved away enough so that he would have to stand if he wanted to get to me. I could feel tears forming in the corners of my eyes but I pushed them down, refusing to cry right now. Grayson only stared at me, seeming surprised by my outbreak.

"You will not speak to me like that," Grayson spat. "I am your alpha. I demand your respect and cooperation." He stood and approached me slowly. I knew he was trying to intimidate me.

I stood my ground. "Well, you know what, Alpha? Ever since we've come back to your pack, you've treated me like an inconvenience, like I didn't matter to you at all. The only time you ever talk to me is when it's forced on you or when you're in the mood to use my body like some plaything! I thought you loved me." I took a deep breath, just barely getting past the sob that was rising in my throat. "But now I know that I'm only here to bring you power. You don't love me and you never have."

Grayson shrugged. "And what if that's true? The mate bond will force you to stay with me no matter how I treat you."

I sucked in a deep breath. That was all the confirmation that I needed. This wasn't the Grayson that I knew back in Paris. This Grayson didn't want me. And you know what? I didn't want him.

I shook my head. The tears were flowing freely down my cheeks at this point as I came to my final conclusion. Keeping intense eye contact with my so-called mate, I said, "I'm done letting the mate bond make decisions for me. I'm leaving.

I never want to see you again."

He didn't respond at first.

It seemed as though he was having an inner battle with his wolf, showing all of the telltale signs that he was about tp shift. His arms sprouted with thick, dark hair, his teeth elongated, and his chest grew twice its normal size.

His wolf was fighting to come out.

It broke my heart.

But it was ultimately Grayson's silence that sealed the deal.

The Grayson that I fell in love with would have fought for me and been heartbroken if I said what I just did. He wouldn't be fighting his wolf, the only part of him who wanted me for the right reasons.

I nodded in understanding. It was over. "Goodbye, Grayson," I said through my tears. I turned and walked out the door with my head held high. Grayson was too preoccupied with his inner turmoil to even notice I was leaving.

I left my heart back in that room that day. And I was sure that I would never get it back.

Fleeing from Heartbreak

BELLE

I sprinted down the stairs of the packhouse after leaving Grayson's room, barely able to see where I was going through the tears streaming down my face.

It didn't matter where I was going.

All I cared about at that moment was getting as far away from Grayson as possible.

My chest was constricting, making it hard for me to breathe. My mind became foggy and I stumbled on the last step of the stairs and tripped.

I couldn't stop myself from falling directly onto my butt, whimpering when my back made painful contact with a step behind me.

I didn't lift myself up.

I didn't move.

I didn't think I could even if I wanted to.

My body felt like it was breaking down bit by bit, almost as if it knew what was happening to me. It knew that I had just lost my mate, the man that I was supposed to love for the rest of my life. Not having the strength to get up, I sat on the bottom step of the stairs and sobbed.

I brought my hands up to my face and cried harder than I ever had in my life.

I never thought anything would hurt more than the day when my dad died but I was so so wrong. This felt like my heart had been ripped out of my chest, leaving me to die a slow and painful death filled with misery and regret.

I was thankful that it was still early in the morning because none of the pack members would be awake. They wouldn't witness how broken I was, sitting here crying over someone who didn't even want me.

But I guess it wouldn't matter if someone saw me. Grayson's pack hated me.

Nothing would change that.

"Luna?" someone suddenly said.

My head snapped up and relief entered my chest when I locked eyes with Kyle's. He was standing in front of me in sweatpants and a T-shirt, looking like he had just woken up.

As his sleepy eyes ran over my broken form, fury and worry entered his expression. "What the fuck happened to you?" he asked.

I couldn't stop the sob that escaped my throat as I looked at him. I put my hand over my mouth as I pulled my shaking form up to a standing position. I tried to open my mouth to tell him all that happened but nothing came out.

I felt numb.

So instead, I just shook my head and launched myself into his arms.

Kyle, completely shocked, stumbled back a bit when I made contact with him.

He hesitated a second, probably worrying about what Grayson would think if he saw us hugging, but then securely wrapping his arms around me and squeezed me tight.

"Hey, shh," he said as he ran his hand up and down my back in a soothing way. It didn't stop me from sobbing uncontrollably into his neck.

He didn't try to push me to explain which I was extremely grateful for. He just held me as I cried. I had never appreciated Kyle more than in that moment.

After a few seconds like that, Kyle said, "Hey, everything is going to be alright. I'm going to mind-link the alpha and he'll help you. Whoever did this to you is going to face severe consequences. Everything is going to be okay, I promise."

My head snapped up in a panic and I took a step back so I could see his face. "No! No, you can't mind-link Grayson! I can't see him right now. I can't see him. Please, Kyle. Please don't tell him."

Kyle's brows knit together, as his expression grew even more worried. "Okay, I won't tell him but you need to tell me what the fuck is going on, right fucking now." His voice had gone from comforting to deadly serious in a matter of seconds.

I didn't want to talk.

I didn't want to do anything but crawl into a hole and spend the rest of eternity there.

I was worried that if I even tried to explain what happened between me and Grayson, I would just turn into an uncontrollable sobbing puddle on the floor.

But as Kyle looked at me, sincere worry and panic in his eyes, I knew that I owed it to him.

I couldn't just run away without giving him an explanation.

Something was wrong with Grayson and the pack deserved to know.

I opened my mouth to speak, struggling to get the words out through my tears. "Grayson," I started. "Grayson, he-" I wasn't able to finish.

An intense and blinding pain took over my body with sudden force.

It was like nothing I had ever felt before, even a million times worse than the pain I had felt when I was away from Grayson in Paris. I doubled over, a scream of agony leaving escaping my mouth.

I was vaguely aware of Kyle yelling my name, wiping my hair from my eyes so he could get a better look at my face but couldn't actually look at him. I knew in that moment that this must be what it felt like to die.

I grasped onto Grayson's mark on my neck, suddenly feeling like it was on fire, like someone was branding it with scalding hot iron. I clawed at it, wanting to rip it from my skin.

The pain was only becoming more and more intense with every passing second.

And then suddenly, an instinct so intense coursed through my body that I wasn't able to ignore it even through all of my pain.

Something was wrong with Grayson.

I wasn't sure how I knew it but something was happening to our bond.

It was breaking.

Panic entered my chest.

I grabbed onto Kyle's arm and looked at him. "Something is wrong with Grayson," I said to him. Without waiting for his response, I stood, fighting through the pain so I could sprint back up the stairs and back to Grayson's room.

At that moment, I didn't care about what Grayson had done to me.

I didn't care that he didn't want me.

All I cared about was making sure he was okay.

Even more importantly, I had to make sure he was alive.

Kyle called after me, hot on my trail as we both flew through the packhouse like wild animals. We ran into a couple of other wolves but I shoved them out of my way, my mind only focused on one thing.

When we finally came to the door of Grayson's room, I didn't hesitate to shove it open and burst into the room.

And I stepped into my worst nightmare.

Painful Exodus

BELLE

It felt like my life ended in that moment.

Sitting on the edge of his bed was Grayson in only a pair of boxer shorts.

And sitting on top of him was a naked girl, pressing herself against him and kissing his lips.

Grayson was cupping her bare breast and moaning, grinding himself erotically against her.

Scalding hot pain coursed through my body, begging me to get out of there, to look away but I was incapable of moving, frozen in my absolute worst nightmare.

I couldn't tear my eyes away from horrific view of my soulmate with someone else.

I could barely comprehend what was happening when Kyle grabbed my waist and harshly pulled me behind him, blocking my view of Grayson and the shewolf.

Kyle was grabbing my face, trying to force me to look at him, screaming my name along with some other things that I didn't comprehend.

I couldn't hear him.

I couldn't hear anything through my shock.

Even as the blinding pain I was feeling intensified tenfold by being in the same room as Grayson, I couldn't move. I was in a daze, stuck in my own hell.

"Luna!" Kyle screamed in my face, still trying to get my attention. "Luna! Look at me!"

Still in a trance, my eyes slowly drifted to his.

"You need to get out of here," Kyle said, determination and worry clear in his tone. He was pushing my shoulders back, causing me to stumble backward toward the door.

I could feel the tears rolling down my face. I stared at Kyle, trying to open my mouth to say something. But nothing came out.

He was wiping one of the tears from my cheek but still trying to push me away, saying, "I know. I know, Luna." He nodded his head frantically. "I know you're feeling horrible right now. I know you feel like you can't move but you need to get as far away from here as possible. You need to leave right fucking now. Go. Now." He pushed me back again, now shoving me with harsh force into the hall.

Again, I couldn't say or do anything.

I no longer felt like I had control over my body.

My mind just kept replaying the image of Grayson and that girl in my mind like a bad movie that wouldn't stop.

So this is what it felt like to lose your mate completely and fully.

I was sure that the only other feeling that could compare was death.

"I'm sorry, Luna," Kyle said. "Elijah is going to meet you downstairs and get you as far away from here as possible. You need to move."

He turned my body around and shoved me down the hall with enough force to have me almost falling on my face. I wasn't completely sure what I was doing, but my feet kept moving. Kyle was right, I needed to get away from here.

I staggered down the stairs in a rush, only stopping when someone grabbed my arm and pulled me to their body.

They lifted me up with ease.

For a second, I panicked, thinking it was Grayson.

But it wasn't.

It couldn't be.

I looked up at who was carrying me and saw the worried, sad eyes of Elijah looking down at me. "I've got you, Luna," he said in a soft voice. "Come on, we're getting you out of here."

He didn't wait for me to reply when he started moving.

His determined, quick feet ran through the packhouse in a blur, not stopping to acknowledge the confused looks of those we were passing. It didn't take us long to reach the front door of the packhouse.

Elijah flung it open without hesitation and brought us out into the woods.

The freezing cold of winter hit me like a ton of bricks, seemingly snapping me out of my daze with force. It was then, as Elijah carried me through the woods by the packhouse, sprinting at full speed, that the agony of my situation truly began to sink in.

Grayson was mating with someone else. He had chosen some other girl to be his mate. He didn't want me. He didn't want me. He didn't want me.

I tried to remind myself that I shouldn't care. I was already in the process of leaving him when I found him about to sleep with someone else.

But before that, when Kyle had been holding me on the staircase, before the pain of my mate giving me up had started, I'd still had hope. I still believed that everything would work itself out and Grayson would somehow decide that he actually did want me.

But now I knew. It was over. I had lost him for good.

At this agonizing realization, uncontrollable sobs began to wrack through my body. The sound of my pain frightened even myself, as loud cries left my mouth, echoing through the silence of the forest.

I was grateful that Elijah didn't stop running.

I was grateful that he was carrying me instead of forcing me to run on my own.

I didn't know where we were going and I didn't care.

All I knew was that the further we were from the packhouse, from Grayson, the more numb my pain became. After a few more minutes like this, my stomach began to churn, feeling like acid was rising in my throat. I grabbed Elijah's shoulder.

"Elijah, put me down. Put me down please. I'm going to be sick," I said frantically.

Elijah immediately stopped, dropping to his knees in the snow.

He placed me down in front of him and pulled my hair away from my face as burning liquid immediately came spewing from my mouth, landing on the forest floor.

It went on like that for a while. I alternated between vomiting, hyperventilating, and just sobbing uncontrollably nonstop. Elijah stayed with me through it all, never leaving my side.

I finally stopped puking when all the contents of my stomach were emptied and only bile was left. I tried my best to calm my breathing but it felt like my throat was closing in on itself, like my entire body was breaking down.

I was vaguely aware of Elijah doing his best to calm me. He had one hand rubbing up and down my back while the other was squeezing my hand tightly.

"I'm so sorry," he kept whispering. "I'm so sorry this is happening to you."

It felt like ages before I was finally able to form a coherent thought that wasn't immediately taken over by pain or sickness.

I allowed Elijah to pull me into his arms, laying my head down on his chest while I cried.

There was a very subtle burning sensation that came from touching Elijah that I knew was there because he wasn't my mate.

That's what my body needed right now to calm it down. It needed Grayson. But I didn't care.

I needed the comfort more than I cared about the pain.

After a few minutes, or maybe it was hours, I wasn't sure, I whispered, "Why does it hurt so much?"

Elijah's hand paused its movement on my back. He looked down at me. I was shocked to see that he had tears in his eyes as well. "Your bond with the alpha was the strongest I ever witnessed," he said. "I could feel it the moment I met you. Your souls were interlocked as one, meant to be together forever. But because he has..." he hesitated, whispering his next word, "rejected you, you're losing part of your soul right now. The fact that he had already marked you is only worse. Your body is breaking down."

I sucked in a breath. "Am-am I going to die?"

Elijah's sad expression deepened. He shook his head in defeat. "I don't know," he whispered.

More tears fell from my eyes at this revelation. So this was what it felt like to die.

And yet, I couldn't bring myself to be scared of my death.

It already felt like I was dead.

Maybe if that were truly dead, the pain would stop.

Elijah suddenly grabbed my chin and forced my teary gaze back on his. "I don't know what the hell you are thinking right now but whatever it is, it needs to stop. It's not true. You are strong. You will not let the mate bond defeat you and tear you apart. You will get through this. And you will do it with your head held high like the powerful luna you are."

I stared at him.

I didn't feel powerful or strong.

I felt broken.

Defeated.

Used and forgotten.

But I knew he was right.

This couldn't be my end.

I couldn't let Grayson win.

Not after all that he had done to me.

I nodded my head. "Okay," I said.

Elijah nodded back. "Okay," he repeated.

Comfort in the Cold

BELLE

Elijah moved gently, removing his arms from around me. I whimpered quietly as even the slightest movement caused searing pain in my body. He stood and took off the sweatshirt he was wearing so now he was only in his pajama bottoms, a shirt, and soaking wet slippers. He handed the sweatshirt to me. "Here. Put this on."

I moved slowly but with determination and, with the help of Elijah, was able to get the piece of clothing over my shaking form.

"Thank you," I said to him. I hadn't even realized how cold I was until his sweatshirt, still warm from his body heat, was wrapped around me like a comforting hug.

Elijah nodded. He crouched down next to me. "Okay, so here's what's going to happen now," he said in a calming voice.

"You're going to stay right here and try to get control over your body and emotions. It's going to be hard but you need to do it in order to face what comes next. Take deep calming breaths and try to think not about you-know-who," he said, obviously referring to Grayson. Well, at least I knew that he wasn't talking about Voldemort.

He reached over and pushed my hair out of my face in a comforting manner. I smiled weakly at him and nodded my head. I could do that. Right?

"I'm going to go back to the packhouse and get your stuff," Elijah continued. "And then we're going to get you on a bus and as far away from here as possible. Where does your family live?"

"I don't have any family," I said quietly, dropping my gaze in embarrassment. "At least not any that would want me around."

Elijah swore quietly under his breath, running a hand through his hair in frustration. "You've got to be shitting me," he sighed. "Okay. That's fine. We'll figure something else out then."

I didn't respond.

It was embarrassing how much of a mess my life was.

I had thought I had it all figured out when I fell in love with Grayson and made the decision to stay with him when we came back from Paris. Boy, was I wrong.

I had given everything up for him. My apartment, my job, even the chance to make amends with my mother. I'd gotten nothing in return.

It just went to show how destructive I truly was, destroying and hurting anyone that came to know me. Even my own parents.

Even myself.

"Luna, look at me," Elijah suddenly said.

I raised my head to look at him, wishing he wouldn't call me that anymore. I wasn't his luna. I was just Belle. Poor, broken Belle.

"You're going to get through this," Elijah said. His voice held no hesitation. "It's going to take a while but the pain will lessen. All of this will become a horrible memory. What the alpha has done to you is going to haunt you for the rest of your life. There is nothing we can do about that and for that, I apologize. But I can promise you that your life will not always revolve around this day. You will move on. Things will get better. I promise."

As I stared into Elijah's eyes that held much more confidence than my own, I couldn't stop myself from doubting his words. The pain that I was feeling right now, both physically and emotionally, was so overwhelming that it felt like it would never end.

How could I possibly move on from this?

How could I possibly go on living my life knowing that Grayson, the person that I cared about more than anybody else in the world, hated me?

But the determination and sincereness in Elijah's words gave me hope. And hope was all I could ask for at that moment. Hope would give me the strength to go on living another day.

Elijah stood when I didn't reply to his lofty claims. I was grateful that he seemed to be dropping the subject for the time being. "Okay, I have to go get your stuff now. We need to get you out of here. The further you are from the alpha, the less pain you will feel. And the sooner you can heal."

I wanted to trust that what he was saying was true but my pain only seemed to increase at even the thought of being away from Grayson.

"Shit," Elijah suddenly said. He was looking back in the direction of the packhouse with a worried expression. "I'm going to have to get past the alpha to get your stuff from his room, aren't I?" He let out a quiet growl of frustration.

"Maybe-"

"My stuff isn't in his room," I interrupted. "I haven't stayed there for a while."

Elijah's knit together. "Then where have you been sleeping?"

I thought seriously about just saying screw it and leaving town without any of my things.

I didn't want to have to explain what really happened between Grayson and me, explain that I hadn't slept in the same bed as Grayson for weeks.

But the things in my suitcase and backpack were all that I had in the world. I would be left with only the clothes on my back if I didn't get them before I left.

"Room 101," I finally whispered.

"In the basement?" Elijah asked. The tenseness in his tone told me he knew exactly what room I was talking about.

I nodded. "Yeah."

Elijah growled but didn't ask any more questions, thank God. I wasn't ready to rehash things and he seemed to understand that. "Okay. Okay, fine. Then that's where I'm going." His eyes softened when they fell back on me. "Are you going to be okay here on your own for a little while? No one knows you're here but me so no one is going to find you. I'll go as fast as I can."

I wanted to say no.

I wanted him to stay with me.

I was terrified of what would happen if I came in contact with Grayson again.

The pain would surely be immeasurable. But I reminded myself that there was no way that he would come looking for me. He didn't want me.

He was busy sleeping with some other woman at that exact moment, right as Elijah and I spoke. The intense pain coursing through my body confirmed that fact.

"I'll be okay," I said.

Elijah didn't hide his grimace, probably put off by how broken my voice sounded. He bent down and left a soft kiss on my forehead. I smiled weakly up at him when he straightened, my heart warming at how sweet and caring he was.

"I'll be quick," he said. "All of this will be over soon."

He smiled at me once more and turned, ready to start off in the direction from which we came.

"Elijah?" I asked quickly, stopping him before he could go.

He turned and looked at me. He raised a brow in question.

"Thank you," I whispered. "Really. Thank you."

He smiled again. "Of course, Luna. You have nothing to thank me for."

And with that, he turned and sprinted off into the woods.

I watched him run away from me until I couldn't see him anymore. He was like a blur in the wind, beautiful and strong, his werewolf genes making him faster than I could even comprehend. When he was finally out of my sight, I allowed myself to lie down on my side, hoping that the cold snow would cool down my feverish body. I was relieved that the waves of pain coursing through me had finally lessened.

They were unpleasant but not nearly as bad as when they had first started. This could only mean one thing.

Grayson was finished mating with someone else. I couldn't decide which was worse, the agonizing torture that I had felt just moments ago or simply knowing that Grayson had sex with someone else, officially choosing them as his mate instead of me.

Probably the latter.

All of this had made me doubt all of my decisions.

First, my decision to stay with Grayson in the first place.

And second, my decision to not allow him to use me in order to gain power.

If I had, I would still be in that horrible house now, lonely and heartbroken, knowing he only wanted me for his own selfish reasons. But what if things would have changed if I had slept with him? What if that is what Grayson needed to come to the realization that he still loved me? I shook my head violently, trying to erase the thought from my head. But even as I was able to rid it from my mind, I knew that it would be a question that would haunt me forever.

I sighed deeply and reached for the mark that Grayson had left on my neck what felt like an eternity ago. It flared up at my touch, angry and throbbing, shooting agonizing pain throughout every part of my body.

I gasped loudly when my body tensed up and dropped my hand in a flash.

Well, I won't be doing that again, I thought bitterly as I stuffed my face in the snow to seek some comfort from the hot pain. I wondered if the bite mark would heal now or if I would have to live with the constant reminder of Grayson's betrayal prominently displayed on my neck. Happy thoughts, Belle, I reminded myself, thinking about what Elijah had said to me before he left. Think about something else. Anything else.

It didn't work.

It was as if that was the only thought that my mind could conjure up.

And with the image of Grayson kissing a naked woman on his lap, not even stopping when I walked into the room, replaying over and over again in my head, I allowed myself to cry.

It felt good to cry. It felt good to let myself feel my emotions for a second before I had to jump back into the real world.

I had learned this when my father died and I was left on my own. Once Elijah was back, I would wipe my tears and force myself to stand up with my head held high.

But for now... I just cried.

***

Elijah was right when he said he would be quick.

It couldn't have been more than an hour before he came sprinting back into my view with my backpack on his back and my suitcase securely in his arms. He was wearing a different outfit as well, now in jeans, a coat, and big boots.

I stood to meet him, quickly wiping the tears from my eyes and pushing my shoulders back in the way that I promised myself I would do.

I wished I'd put on shoes before I'd left the packhouse in such a hurry.

My sock covered feet were freezing. Thankfully, I had shoes in my backpack that I put on when Elijah finally reached me. And then I put on the coat that he handed me as well.

When I straightened and looked at Elijah, he said, "You ready?"

I nodded stiffly. "Yes. I'm ready."

He quickly shrugged off my backpack and handed it to me. "Put this on," he said.

I didn't question him, grabbing the backpack from his hand and putting its straps over my shoulders. Then, he turned from me and squatted down, motioning for me to get on his back. "Hop on."

I felt a blush travel up my chest. I hoped Elijah didn't see me as weak, like glass he needed to care for so that it wouldn't break. I was very capable of walking. "You don't have to carry me again," I said. "I can walk."

Elijah shook his head, not moving from his position. "Absolutely not. You're swaying just standing there and shaking like a leaf. I'm going to carry you."

I still hesitated. "Won't it be too heavy to carry me and my luggage?" I asked.

Elijah laughed and directed his gaze over his shoulder to me. "No. It won't be too heavy. I'm a werewolf with amazing strength and you're..." his eyes traveled up and down my form, a frown forming on his lips. "Well, you're skin and bones. That's the first thing I'm going to do when we get out of town. I'm making you a four-course meal and making sure you eat every bite."

I stiffened a bit at his words. "You, you're coming with me?" I asked in shock. I had thought that he was simply going to put me on a bus and be done with me. I had thought that I would never see him again after today.

Elijah finally turned and looked at me, a soft expression taking over his features. "Of course I am. I'm not going to just let my luna go off on her own without any protection. Especially after what you just went through. I probably should have told you that, but with all of the commotion, it just slipped my mind. Kyle is coming too. He's going to meet us wherever we end up going and bring my things with him. He'll mind-link me the moment he can get away from the alpha without him noticing. He can't stay with us forever, unfortunately, but he's going to commute back and forth when he can. We've already discussed it through mind-link. So I'm sorry, sweetcheeks, but you're stuck with us," he smiled widely.

I didn't smile back. Although I appreciated the fact that he wanted to care for me, I couldn't let him do this. And Kyle too?

Nope.

No way.

They both had lives to live.

I wasn't going to let them disrupt their lives just because they took pity on some girl who was rejected by their alpha.

"No," I shook my head, leaving no room to argue in my tone. "I'm not letting you come. You need to stay here and be close to your mate. I'm not your luna anymore," I said bitterly. "In fact, I never was. Not officially at least. You don't owe me anything. You barely even know me."

Elijah winced slightly at the mention of Grayson's betrayal and the wavering it caused in my voice. "You are my luna," he said in a firm tone. "The alpha may have chosen somebody else to help him lead the pack, but my loyalty will always be with you, the true luna of my pack. Nothing will ever be able to convince me otherwise."

A tiny bit of tenseness left my form. My gratefulness for Elijah only grew with his kind words. It felt good to know that at least one person still cared about me. Maybe even two, I thought as I pictured Kyle's smiling face.

"And I can live without seeing Kyle every day. I don't know if you've noticed, but he can be a bit much sometimes,"

Elijah laughed. I smiled a bit. "Our bond is strong. We'll be fine."

I searched his expression for any sort of hesitation. But I couldn't find any. He really did want to come with me. And who was I to deny his care? It would be nice not to be on my own for once.

"Fine," I finally said. "But only under one condition."

Elijah raised a brow in question.

"You can't call me Luna anymore. My name is Belle."

Elijah frowned, immediately shaking his head and opening his mouth to argue.

"Please," I said before he could disagree. "It hurts too much to be called Luna. The title only comes with horrible memories. I just want to be Belle. Just Belle. Not Luna."

Elijah hesitated for a moment. He didn't look happy but eventually, he nodded his head. "My wolf and I don't like it but... But I'll try my best."

I was pleased with his answer. That was all I could ask for.

"Shall we get going then?" he asked, motioning for me to get on his back again.

I nodded, ready to be as far away from Grayson as I could get. I climbed onto his back, locking my ankles together and squeezing my legs tightly around his waist so that he could grab my suitcase and hold it instead of gripping my legs to keep me in place.

Elijah started to move quickly.

I found myself suddenly very glad that he had insisted on carrying me.

Even just hanging onto his back in my weakened state was proving to be extremely difficult.

And all the movement was making my nausea come back with a sudden vengeance.

But I didn't complain. Instead, I just tightened my arms around his neck and laid my head on his back. I imagined I was on a boat in the middle of a lake somewhere, fishing with my dad.

That had always been one of our favorite things to do together.

As we continued our trek further and further into the forest, I couldn't stop myself from longingly looking back at the direction from which we came.

I wished more than anything that things were different.

I wished I could go back to those few weeks in Paris when Grayson still seemed to love me.

I wished that I could live in that memory forever.

But since I knew I couldn't, since I knew that it was time for me to move on to the part of my life that no longer involved Grayson, I shut my eyes gently, leaning my head back onto Elijah's back.

And I tried my very best to let my mind drift off to happier thoughts.

Journey Through the Snow

BELLE

Elijah carried me with ease, never showing a single sign of fatigue.

The tranquility of the forest surrounding us in addition to the comfortable silence between Elijah and me, made for a soothing environment. All that could be heard was the faint chirping of some birds nearby and Elijah's rough steps in the snow.

"So where would you like to go?" Elijah asked me about a mile into our hike.

I set my chin down on his shoulder and sighed deeply. I didn't want to make any decisions. I wanted to go to sleep.

And then never wake up.

It was like my head was filled with murky water, not letting a single clear thought through.

I was drowning in the water, gasping for air, violently swimming upwards.

Swimming, swimming, with no end in sight. My chest constricted painfully as if I was really in the water and my breath caught in my throat. I tightened my legs around Elijah's waist, trying to calm my shaking, exhausted body.

I shrugged weakly. "I don't care," I barely got out. "Wherever you want."

Elijah chuckled softly. "I've only ever been off pack lands a handful of times. I wouldn't even know which direction to head in if you asked me to decide."

I paused.

Do I even know what direction to head in? I didn't know much about the world either.

I had been to Paris and that was about it. The rest of my life had been spent in hospitals and at home taking care of my dad.

"Come on," he urged in a soothing voice. "There's got to be somewhere you want to go."

Only one place came to mind. "I guess we could go to Minneapolis," I said.

Minneapolis was the city where I grew up and only a few hours away by car. Although it didn't contain many good memories, mostly just memories of my dad dying, it was the only home I had ever known. A thought popped into my head.

I might even be able to stop by my old apartment and get some of my stuff.

That is, if my old landlord, Mr. Hummer, hadn't sold all of it yet.

He was a mean old man with beady eyes, yellow teeth, and breath that only ever smelled like either cigarettes or salami, nothing else. The number of eviction notices that I had received from him for forgetting to pay rent not even twenty-four hours after it was due was ridiculous.

I had no doubt that Mr. Hummer would not react kindly to seeing me, especially after I went missing for months, leaving him without a rent check and with the responsibility of dealing with all of my things. But it was worth a shot, right?

"Minneapolis could work," Elijah said in approval. "I'll go anywhere you want but Minneapolis is close enough for Kyle to commute back and forth but far enough away from the alpha for you to heal."

I cringed slightly at the mention of Grayson. My heart constricted in my chest. Elijah winced.

"Sorry," he said quickly. "I'll stop talking about him."

I shook my head. "No, it's okay. I'll get over it. I'm..." I hesitated, but only for a moment. Then lifted my chin in determination. "I can handle it. I'm strong."

Elijah didn't waste a second in replying, "Hell yeah, you are! You don't need him. Especially since you've got me. I'm pretty great in case you haven't noticed."

I laughed. And it felt good. It gave me hope.

At that moment, I became determined to get back on my feet as soon as possible so that Elijah could get back to his life.

While I appreciated him to the moon and back and knew that I wouldn't have been able to get through this day without him, he had better things to do than to take care of me.

I had been on my own basically my entire life.

I was good at it.

I could do it again.

I stretched my neck and gave him a quick peck on the cheek. "Thank you, Elijah. I know you're giving up a lot to be with me. It really means a lot."

Elijah smiled. "It's an honor. No need to thank me."

We walked for a few more minutes before my arms and legs began to get tired. My body was running out of adrenaline, quickly making me exhausted beyond belief. Not to mention the aching pain that was still throbbing throughout my body.

It felt like I had the worst flu ever.

"How much further until we get to town?" I asked. All I wanted to do was get on a bus, curl into a little ball in one of the seats, and sleep until we reached the cities.

"About ten more minutes," Elijah said. "Do you need to take a break? We can stop for a few minutes."

I shook my head quickly. "No. No, that's okay. I don't want to stop. I just didn't realize how far away the nearest town was from the packhouse."

Elijah looked down at me over his shoulder with a worried expression. "Are you sure? You're not looking so good,

Luna."

I narrowed my eyes at him. He had promised to call me by my real name.

"Sorry," he said quickly. "I'm still getting used to not calling you that. It might take some time. It goes against all of my instincts to call you by your real name."

I chose not to mention the fact that he hadn't even tried calling me Belle yet. How did he know he couldn't do it if he didn't even try?

I sighed. "It's fine." I tightened my arms around him, trying not to fall off his back and straight onto my butt in the snow. My forehead came in contact with his shoulder, trying to find some sort of stability. "I think I should walk for a while. I'm starting to feel motion sickness."

I didn't have to look at Elijah to know he was frowning. He slowed his steps, thinking about it. Then, thankfully, he stopped. He set my suitcase down in the snow and gently grabbed my legs so he could help me off his back.

I couldn't stop myself from leaning against a nearby tree the second my feet touched the ground. I shut my eyes tightly, trying to breathe. When I opened them a few seconds later; Elijah was looking at me with a distressed expression.

"I'm fine," I said before he could ask how I was doing. I straightened, pushing off the tree and tugging my shoulders back. "Let's keep going."

Elijah didn't look convinced by my lacking display of strength.

He thrust out his hand, palm up. "Backpack," he said, motioning for me to give my bag to him.

My brows knit together in frustration. I wasn't that weak. I could still carry my own damn backpack, thank you very much.

"I've got it. I can do it," I said stubbornly. I started to walk in the same direction we were going before, hoping he would drop the subject.

Unfortunately, I wasn't so lucky. Elijah stepped in front of me, blocking my path. "I know you can do it," he said sternly, still holding his hand out. "I just don't care. If you're walking, I'm carrying your backpack."

I frowned at him. His unfaltering expression told me I wasn't going to win this battle. I sighed deeply and angrily yanked the backpack straps off my shoulders. I thrust it at him. "Fine. Here."

The corner of his lips turned up, as he contently took the bag from my hands. "Thank you," he said.

I rolled my eyes, feeling my own lips form a small smile. Why he looked so happy to be carrying a bag filled to the brim with books, clothes, and other useless objects was beyond me. But I was still grateful for his help.

He put the bag on his shoulders and bent down to pick up my suitcase as well. Then he looked at me, waiting patiently for me to give the go-ahead to keep moving. I used all the willpower left in my body to walk straight without stumbling.

But it was hard. Really. Fucking. Hard.

My legs screamed at me with every step, the burning in my chest traveling throughout the rest of me the further away I became from Grayson. It was like my body knew that I was leaving the man I loved and because it had such an intense connection to him, it was determined to let my mind know that it hated it.

I had never felt like my mind and body were two separate entities before, but that was the only way to describe it now.

My mind and body were fighting against each other in a rigorous battle that neither would win.

All for a man who hated me. Beat me, used me, gained my trust and then tore me down in the most painful way possible. I hadn't even realized I was crying until my vision blurred with unshed tears. I groaned in frustration and violently wiped at the tears, mad at myself for crying yet again.

I looked down at my feet, determined to keep walking, willing them to carry me just a little longer. And then a branch, hidden deep in the snow, seemed to grab onto my foot like a twisted hand, tugging my body down with a sudden force.

I crashed into the snow with a surprised scream, landing gracelessly on my front. I couldn't stop myself from crying out my frustration. I slammed my fists down in the snow angrily over and over again.

Somewhere deep inside of me was screaming, Get your act together, Belle!

This is why Grayson couldn't love you!

This is why your mother left you!

You're weak, you can't even walk without falling!

I let out a sob, more out of anger and frustration than sadness.

I would prove the voice wrong.

I would prove everyone wrong.

I could do it.

I could be strong.

And I was going to do it on my own. Nobody would hurt me ever again.

Elijah didn't waste a second, quickly crouching down next to me the moment I fell. "That's it," he said harshly. He set my suitcase to the side. "I'm going to carry you. We're leaving your suitcase here and I'm carrying you the rest of the way whether you like it or not. I'll come back for your stuff later, once we've gotten you somewhere you can rest that isn't in the freezing cold." He tried to wrap his arms around me so he could lift me into the air but I stopped him.

"No," I said roughly. I shoved his arms away from me, letting my anger and frustration show through. "I can do it. I said I can do it and I will."

I wiped my hair out of my face and sat up. One of my elbows was severely scraped up through my jacket and dripping blood. My knees didn't look any better.

I tried not to care that my only jacket now had a huge hole in it.

Pushing the pain aside, I stood with great effort. I looked at Elijah who was still watching me from his crouched position.

He shook his head in amazement, bringing himself to stand as well. "I know you don't want to hear this right now and, honestly, I'm not really sure why I'm telling you this right after you had your heart broken," he started, "but you would have made an amazing luna. Truly. The alpha made a terrible mistake giving you up."

I wasn't sure how to respond to that. "Yeah, well," I said, shifting my weight uncomfortably. "That's all in the past now.

Let's keep going. I'm cold."

Elijah nodded, not hiding his sad expression. "Okay."

We continued our trot through the woods, Elijah now walking extremely close to me, I'm sure ready to catch me if I fell again. We only got a few more steps in before Elijah suddenly stopped.

I paused as well, turning to look at him a few feet behind me. "Elijah?" I asked.

His brown eyes were glazed over and glassy, appearing much darker than they usually did.

He was looking off into the distance with a strange expression on his face.

I didn't know a lot about it, but by Grayson's explanation and the few times I had seen him do it, I knew Elijah was midlinking someone, talking to them in his mind. But that wasn't what worried me. Elijah's expression was quickly turning panicked, his breathing quickening more and more by the second. Whoever was talking to him was not delivering good news.

When his eyes finally cleared, his gaze snapped to me. His jaw clenched roughly.

"Elijah?" I asked again. "What happened?"

Echoes

BELLE

"Elijah," I said again, "what's wrong?"

Elijah's face had turned as pale as a sheet of paper.

I couldn't tell if it was his wolf or his human side that was upset, based on the rapid change of colors in his eyes. Either way, whatever had just been told to him through mind-link-communicated to him through his brain -could not be good.

I tried approaching him when he didn't answer.

The pain I was feeling suddenly didn't matter; it was quickly being replaced by worry.

Elijah growled when I approached and took a step away, putting a fair number of feet between us. My brows knitted together.

"Kyle," Elijah breathed out heavily.

My heart dropped.

"What?" I asked frantically, "is something wrong with Kyle? How do you know?"

Elijah shook his head rapidly, grabbing onto his hair in tight shifts.

It was obvious now that he was trying to rein in his wolf. Was this what it looked like to be fully mated and know that your mate was hurt?

He looked like he was in a lot of pain.

Shouldn't he be running back to Kyle in a panic?

"Mind link. Mate bond," he choked out, answering my question in short, pained sentences.

The way he spoke, without a hint of deception, made me believe that what he was saying was true. Something was wrong with Kyle. But if Kyle was seriously hurt, Elijah wouldn't be taking his time getting back to the packhouse.

He wouldn't be standing here talking to me.

I may have never known what it felt like to be fully mated, but deep inside I knew I would feel it if something life-threatening happened to Grayson. And nothing would keep me from getting to him. It was the way Elijah was looking at me right now-wide eyes, serious expression-that told me there was something he was keeping from me, something he couldn't tell me.

Something serious.

With cautious movements, I stepped towards him.

"There's something else, isn't there?" I asked in a quiet voice.

Elijah shut his eyes tightly for a second before he nodded sharply in confirmation.

I sucked in a breath.

"Grayson?" I asked. "Did Grayson do something?"

He didn't give me any sort of confirmation, but his intense, nonstop stare gave me all the answer I needed.

I was right. Grayson had done something, and based on Elijah's reaction, it wasn't good.

My mouth went dry, my heart rate escalating until it was beating at the same pace as a horse's hoofs at the Kentucky Derby.

"Has he hurt someone?"

Elijah blinked once.

There was no doubt in my mind that he was struggling with whatever he was told through mind-link. He wanted to talk to me but couldn't for some reason.

Something, or someone, was stopping him.

He ignored my last question, instead struggling to say, "Luna. You have to-"

He choked on his words, stopped by an unseen force.

His mouth shut and his eyes snapped closed tightly.

He grabbed onto his chest in immense pain, bending over himself until he was kneeling on the ground. Panic filled my body.

I didn't waste a second running to him and grabbing his shoulder. I tried to help him up, wrapping my arm around his waist and tugging him to his feet.

"No!" he yelled the moment I touched him.

He pushed with just enough force to send me stumbling backward. I yelled out in shock.

Elijah didn't give me any time to process his actions.

"Please..." he continued, desperation and pain lacing his tone, "you have to tell me..."

"Tell you what, Elijah?" I asked.

I tried to keep my distance, knowing now that he didn't want me to touch him, but it was getting harder and harder to stay away as his pain only seemed to increase.

"Tell you what?!"

And then, without warning, his back straightened. He sprang to his feet and looked at me with a bright, content expression. He smiled widely, showing all his teeth.

It sent chills down my spine.

"I must report back to the packhouse now. Goodbye," he said through that smile of clenched teeth.

And without giving any sort of other explanation, he spun on his heel and began walking in the direction from which we had come.

What. The actual. Fuck.

I allowed myself to stand there for a second, staring at his back, before I set off after him.

His confusing words ran through my mind. He needed to go back to the packhouse? Why? It made no sense.

What had happened? What couldn't he tell me?

It didn't bother me that he seemed to not be coming with me anymore. I wasn't selfish enough to worry about my own comfort when other people's wellbeing were at stake. No, what bothered me was the fact that something was obviously very, very wrong.

And Elijah was walking in the exact direction of the danger, acting completely insane and unaware.

"Hey!" I shouted, jogging a bit to catch up with him. "Where are you going? What the hell is going on?"

He didn't say a single thing in return. As if I weren't there, he continued walking, still sporting that eerie smile. I grabbed onto his arm, not willing to give up.

"Hey, you'd better tell me what's going on right now, Elijah!"

He continued to ignore me.

"Hey, stop! Please! Did something bad happen to Kyle?" I said.

Still, Elijah didn't stop. He continued to let me scream in his ear for a good minute without responding.

"I'm not leaving you until you tell me what's going on!" I yelled.

Suddenly, he grabbed my arm and forcefully yanked me behind him. I screamed, surprised by his sudden commanding force. I was now walking straight up against his back, my movement incapacitated by his death grip.

He walked in the same way he had before. His hand moved down my arm, maintaining enough pressure to keep me in place, and then held my hand harshly.

I noticed how badly his body was shaking against mine.

He squeezed my hand twice, then placed his pointer finger against my palm, moving it frantically over my skin.

It took me a second, but I realized with shock that he was tracing letters on the palm of my hand.

DON'T FOLLOW.

DANGER.

My breath caught in my throat as I interpreted his writing.

The fact that he needed to write the words out on my palm instead of telling me face to face only distressed me more.

Why couldn't he flat-out tell me what was wrong? Was somebody listening? Was he in trouble?

Whatever it was, Elijah was trying to tell me to stay behind while he went and dealt with it.

While, might I add, he continued to smile in a way that I could only describe as soul-chilling.

I decided then and there that, although the last thing I wanted was to see Grayson again, the thought of Kyle or somebody else getting hurt as a consequence of my actions earlier today was reason enough to go back to the packhouse and help however I could.

I squeezed his hand once and began to write my own message on his palm, hoping he would understand how I felt instead of trying to argue.

I'LL COME.

Elijah's steps faltered for only a second as he interpreted the information I relayed to him.

Then he squeezed my hand so hard it almost hurt.

NO, he wrote back, his letters accompanied by another hard squeeze, emphasizing his point.

I squeezed his hand back just as harshly.

YES.

With that, Elijah stopped walking so abruptly that I ran into his back.

His body was still shaking as he wrapped his other trembling hand around mine so that both were squeezing my fingers.

He waited a second, his shoulders rising and falling with a deep, focused breath before he squeezed my hand yet again, softer than before.

PLEASE. DON'T FOLLOW. PLEASE.

I faltered. He was serious. He really didn't want me to come, wanted to go back on his own while I stayed behind. I could feel the guilt eating at me.

I couldn't handle it if Elijah or somebody else got hurt fighting my battles.

My stubbornness was surging forward in full force.

But did I really have a choice?

Sensing my resolve, Elijah squeezed my hands gently again writing, GO BE HAPPY.

I didn't expect the tears that started to run down my cheeks. Even though they were just letters on my palm, his words meant the world to me. There was sincerity and hope emanating from his firm grip, causing deep warmth to spread through me.

Elijah wanted what was best for me. I knew that.

And if that was going off on my own and leaving him to fight my battles... Then so be it.

I trusted him. I couldn't stop myself from launching myself onto him, wrapping my arms around his waist from behind in a hug that I hoped conveyed all I was feeling.

My gratitude for his help and friendship.

My hope to see him again one day under better circumstances.

"Thank you," I whispered against his back, holding back tears, "Thank you."

Elijah didn't respond. It didn't surprise me given the circumstances. But I knew he felt the same way. I knew that, if he'd had the chance, he would be telling me I was a badass who was going to rock it in the real world.

He placed his hands over mine in front of him and sighed, squeezing me lightly.

As sad as I was, the whole experience felt strangely cathartic. Not only was I saying goodbye to Elijah and the incredible friendship that had proven to be so important over the last month or so, I was saying goodbye to Grayson and the life and people that came with loving him.

I felt stronger. I felt happier. I felt ready.

We stayed like that for a minute, both of us silently communicating our goodbyes through our tight embrace. Elijah let me hold onto him for as long as I wanted to, seeming to need the release of emotions just as much as I did.

"Be safe," I whispered to him.

And then, as if we both knew it was time, he squeezed my hand, wrote, GOODBYE, LUNA, and let me go.

Leaving me, once again, completely alone.

***

Elijah was right.

The nearest town was a good ten-minute walk from us.

After grabbing my suitcase and backpack, it didn't take me long to make my way into the small town. Once there, I was able to get a bus ticket with what little money I had stashed away in my backpack and hop a bus to Minneapolis.

During the ride I allowed myself to process what had happened to me over the last several months. I reminded myself that Elijah had told me not to think about Grayson, that it would only make the pain worse.

He was right about that too.

I ached all over just imagining Grayson's smile, his laugh, his pet names for me, the night we had spent hours talking under the sparkling lights of the Eiffel Tower.

Just for now, I told myself, "you will let yourself think of him.

You will let yourself be consumed by the thoughts of what could have been.

But the second you get off this bus, the second you get back to your old life, you will push him out of your mind.

You will not let yourself drown in self-pity.

You will not wonder what you did wrong.

You will be strong. You will walk with your head held high and not let what he did weigh you down.

And that was exactly what I did.

At the bus station in Minneapolis, I had a newfound outlook on things.

I wiped my tears and pushed back my shoulders, wasting no time before walking to my old familiar apartment building. I had intended to retrieve my things. I had left most of my belongings in my small studio apartment before going to Paris. Although I'd been gone a few months and hadn't paid rent since before then, I hoped that my landlord had found it in him to keep at least a few of my things instead of selling them all or leaving them on the street.

I was wrong.

My crusty old landlord wouldn't even open the door for me when I came knocking.

He screamed at me for a few minutes before telling me to go away. When I continued to beg, he threatened to call the police. So I found myself back on the street with only the items in my backpack and suitcase and the clothes on my back.

As I looked around, I was flooded with memories of my childhood with my dad.

While I was walking, I came across the playground where he had used to take me on the weekends. Then I passed the spital where he'd died, only a few blocks from my old apartment. The good memories suddenly and thoroughly turned bad.

I realized that this place, this city, only came with reminders of sadness or heartbreak, even if the memories had been happy at the time they were made.

My dad would have wanted so much better for me then what I was doing right now.

I almost broke down then and there, not knowing what to do next, but I didn't let myself.

Instead, I got another bus and let it take me far away. And then, when I felt like it, I got another one, letting instinct and chance decide where I went.

I rode that bus through the night and didn't stop until the driver told me I had to get off.

I found myself in a new city with the hope of a fresh start blazing in my chest.

I was ready to move on and meet the stronger, more independent, more capable version of myself.

I wasn't going to let anybody tear me down.

Bring it on, world.

Secrets in Red Ink

KYLE

Several hours earlier, the morning of Belle's departure

I couldn't sleep.

No matter how I tossed and turned through the night, the tension running through my body kept me awake. I had come across some information last night that I wasn't supposed to know about—information concerning my alpha.

It had all started when I couldn't stop worrying about the luna, her odd behavior constantly on my mind. I never saw her anymore. In fact, I hadn't seen her in weeks.

Even when I looked for her, she was nowhere to be found. At first, I just missed her; she was fun to have around and made the alpha's ever-changing moods more bearable.

But then it turned into something else.

Something was going on between the alpha and luna that I didn't know about.

My first clue was when the luna asked me to be the mediator between her and the alpha due to some fight they'd had during her second night with the pack. This wasn't the oddest thing in and of itself. Mates fought, it's the way it was— Goddess knew Elijah and I fought on a regular basis. But the alpha and luna just didn't seem like the type.

The next clue was when she showed up in the kitchen sporting a black eye and bruised chin and said she hadn't been eating! What the hell? She had looked worried and tired, maybe even depressed.

Thinking it could solve the problem and looking to take care of my luna, I had taken her straight to the alpha. I ignored the fact that she was screaming and crying as if she was scared of seeing him.

I ignored the look of terror in her eyes.

Now in hindsight, I regretted my actions.

I should have spoken to her first. I should have listened to her before deciding what was best for her.

I hadn't seen her since that morning, several weeks ago. My worry grew with every day that I didn't see her. She wasn't even at the weekly pack dinners, the chair next to the alpha always empty.

The alpha never gave an explanation for her absence: he was quiet and focused on his work, more so than I had ever seen him.

Time passed until it was as if the luna hadn't existed at all.

The alpha might lash out at me for thinking I knew what was best for his mate instead of him.

But I convinced myself that I had no choice. I cared too much about the luna to let this go.

After a long meeting that morning, I decided to ask the alpha about the luna, hoping for a logical explanation. I was shocked when he only seemed bothered that I had brought the subject up, not angry.

He acted as though it was an inconvenience to talk about his mate.

He nonchalantly told me that she was having a hard time adjusting and needed space, and insisted I didn't worry about her anymore.

Of course, these words that were meant to reassure me did the complete opposite.

Something wasn't adding up. Alphas didn't leave their mates alone, especially at a time like this, important not only for the pack but for the luna as she adjusted to life as a leader.

If the luna was struggling even a little, the alpha wouldn't even consider leaving her side and if, for some odd reason, he did consider it, his wolf wouldn't let him act on it. Put off by his answer and not ready to let the subject drop, I joked about my surprise over the fact that he hadn't mated. I hoped this would get a response out of him: alphas were known to become furious and overprotective when asked about their own mating processes.

To his credit, the alpha did react. Just not in the way I had expected.

He perked up and looked at me for the first time since the start of the conversation.

He didn't speak for a moment, thinking. Then his lips curled up in an odd smile.

"Ah, yes... Mating," he said, leaning back in his chair.

He looked up at the ceiling and licked his lips. Then he looked back at me with a new twinkle in his eye and clapped me on the back.

"Not to worry. Mating will be happening soon. Very soon."

Without another word, he had strode out of the conference room, determination evident in every single step. I watched him go to his office with a sour taste in my mouth.

The way he spoke made it seem as though he had forgotten what mating was.

So by this point I was in a panic. His strange behavior mixed with the missing luna equaled a need for answers.

I had to find the luna and figure out exactly what was going on. My first stop was the room she shared with the alpha. I knocked multiple times and, when no one answered, barged in.

I couldn't bring myself to care that no one besides her and the alpha was allowed in here; I was too focused on my mission.

To my shock, the room was empty. The luna was nowhere to be found.

I had figured this was where she had been hiding out, and obviously I had figured wrong.

As I looked around the room, my eyes stopped at the alpha's desk.

It was extremely messy-strange, as the alpha was one of the neatest people I knew.

He became upset when even a paperclip was out of place. There were papers thrown across the entire surface of the desk, covered in red ink.

I approached, curiosity and concern overriding my usual dedication to rules.

What I found made my heart drop.

All of the papers were letters written to the alpha.

Sent by vampires.

No, that can't be right. The alpha wouldn't be in secret communication with our mortal enemies.

I reread the letter I was holding before moving on to the next, hoping to find some other explanation. But there was none. All the letters were written by a vampire clan to the alpha.

And that wasn't even the scariest part.

This wasn't just any clan—it was the most famous clan in the world other than the royal family. It was also the most evil.

This was the Clan of Azazel, receiving the title after supporting the rule of Azazel Mortar, the former king of the vampires.

They had helped him in the War of the Vampires years ago, becoming an army of the most wicked beings ever known.

Unlike other vampires who seemed to have at least some morals, this clan was notorious for murdering without cause and performing despicable acts. Their vile conduct was the reason werewolves and vampires had been at war for so long.

As king, Azazel Mortar moved to allow rogue vampires into the royal clan, ignoring how dangerous that could be, only thinking of gaining more power. Rogues couldn't control their thirst for human blood... And this was why Azazel had lost the throne.

The letters spoke of an ambush on our pack that would take place in three days' time.

The alpha had shared with them all the weak spots in our borders, given them information on the best attack strategies. Together, they had formed a plan to take down our pack.

And after the defeat, they would give us the choice to join them in conquering the next one. And the next one.

Or die.

My hands shook as I read through each letter, taking in the details and committing them to memory. Their ultimate goal was to woo enough wolves to their side to defeat the Mortars, the royal vampires.

And they would. If our pack was defeated and fought against other packs with the help of vampires, we would win.

There was no doubt.

The army of vampires and werewolves would grow until it was the most powerful in the world. Azazel Mortar would have the throne once again.

I dropped the letters back onto the desk after I had finished reading.

I wasn't supposed to know any of this. The alpha was hiding the evidence, and with good reason. My mind drifted to when he had proposed us letting a group of much less dangerous vampires into our lands.

He had thought it would be nice to have them on our side during battles in case we were ever attacked. His idea was shot down immediately by the elders and me.

Vampires and werewolves had never gotten along. Both our species were too proud to work in harmony. If the alpha had proposed us teaming up with the Clan of Azazel during a meeting with the elders, he would have been deemed insane, possibly unfit for his role.

He could have lost all his authority and credibility.

So he had gone behind our backs and communicated with the clan in secret.

Alpha Grayson took great pride in having the most powerful pack in the world, and he had worked hard to earn that title. But I had never thought he was power-hungry enough to willingly endanger the entire pack.

Didn't he know that most, if not all, of our members would die before they agreed to take orders from vampires and help them kill other werewolves?

If he imagines this will somehow help us rise to the top or make history, then he's badly misjudged. It will mean the end of our pack as we know it.

I had very little time to take action.

I thought about going to Beta Adalee, but her name had been mentioned in the letters multiple times. In fact, now that I thought about it, she and the alpha had been awfully friendly ever since we had come home from France.

Was it possible they were in on this together?

There was no one else I could trust with the information who wouldn't be put in danger by knowing. I had to do this myself.

In a flash, I was out of the alpha's room and down the hall.

Although I was st worried about the luna, she was now the last thing on my mind. It was better for her to stay away

anyway. She would be safer if she had no contact with the alpha.

And the alpha would be weaker without his mate.

Once I was in my office, I hurriedly wrote a letter explaining the stakes and handed it off to our strongest pack warrior, Ben. I sent him out with orders to deliver the letter to the nearest pack, about a day's run away.

Ben had amazing endurance and would be able to run all the way there while just barely breaking a sweat. He wasn't to stop for any reason or let anyone except the alpha of the other pack see the letter. Once he had his instructions, Ben sprinted off without any questions, sensing the urgency.

It was clear to me that a war was coming in three days, a war we would not survive if we didn't get help. Hopefully, the pack next door would be willing to help us.

We had a good relationship and a record of fighting battles together. Although this battle would be more dangerous than any of the other ones, I had little doubt that they would step up, especially since it concerned their wellbeing too.

But that wasn't enough. I was going to need more than that.

After ensuring that the alpha was still in his office, I called a pack meeting in the forest.

I ordered everyone to start training and getting ready for an intense battle, emphasizing that these were the alpha's orders instead of my own. At first they were confused and worried and wanted to know what was going on, which was more than fair.

I assured them that I knew just as little as they did, that I was just the messenger.

They got to work right after that. I thought about contacting other packs but stopped myself.

It would take too long to get letters to them, and I couldn't call them without arousing the alpha's suspicion. If all went well with the neighboring pack, I would have an army of about six thousand on my hands.

However, the Clan of Azazel was over ten thousand rogues strong and counting, constantly biting humans and turning them, adding to their numbers.

I needed more assistance if I was going to save my pack.

And there was only one way to do that, only one person who would have just much to lose if the Clan of Azazel were to gain power.

I would have to negotiate and partner with the king of the vampires, the brother of Azazel.

Zagan Mortar.

-----More chapters soon----